Too late
by Daniratoe
Summary: It was supposed to be just an stupid crush on her team lider; but it wasn't stupid, nor just a crush. Rachel Roth was in love with Richard Grayson. And that just broke her so much right now. T for language. Read and Review, please!


**Well, hello there, RobRae fans!**

**I am new here, meaning I am new writing TT fanfiction. I absolutely love RobRae, it is one of my currently favorite ships. Yay!**

**So anyways, this is going to be a quite sad story, just do not cry too much! But I hope you like it. If theres any OOC in any of the characters (mainly Raven) I apologize. I am not used to use her/him in a story.**

**Enjoy, read and review!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans nor Raven or Robin. This story is my creation. I do not intend any profit from it.**

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She was all over the place, but nothing seemed to happen. She didn't care anyways. She didn't have enough emotional equilibrium to care.

She felt so much _dispair_ and _grief_, she felt _hate_ and _anger_ and she felt _betrayal_ and _jealousy_. Raven just wanted to scream and pray anything would take her pain away already. She cried in silence instead, her body levitating in the roof of the T tower while she tried so hard to meditate to forget everything.

She was _so exhausted_.

But Raven was surprised, also. It was strange that her powers didn't destroy everything around her, _yet_. She knew that the Titans had defeated her father, and that she was freed from Trigon's influence once and for all. She didn't have to suffer about letting go of her emotions once in a while as much as before. And she was glad about it.

She suddenly flinched at the next thought. _And he saved me. He believed. He said he cared. He said..._

But –anyways– even if she knew that Trigon was done with, she was still careful with her powers. She wouldn't risk her friends safety.

Her eyes close for a moment and the tears ran down her face with more intensity than before. She had been _so_ stupid. She had misunderstood everything about his behavior towards her, and she was stupid enough to let it hurt her like this. Let _him_ hurt her like this

Sometimes she just hated her powers.

And her brain only seemed to want her to feel worse about it, memories of last night running through her mind again.

She hated her sensorial powers _so damn much!_

Everything started when the team returned from Tokio almost two weeks ago. The kiss between Starfire and Robin in Tokio had hurt her so much, but she let it go, starting to accept the fact that she was simply not the one. It would have been stupid, she thought, to let that fact affect her. It was pointless. It hurt, but what the hell? He was her best friend, so it didn't matter. No body cared.

So she let that go and started her emotional healing process. Thankfully, she thought that day, it wouldn't be so difficult to erase the pain. It was just an stupid crush on their team leader, she concluded.

_'If he was happy, then I should be happy for him too'_ was her reasoning.

But last night's events broke her so much she couldn't manage it properly. And her whole world crashed into darkness and dispair _again_.

They had arrived from down town, for all of them decided that it was time for a group celebration about Starfire and Robin's new relationship _and_ their success in Tokio. She tried to give a lame excuse that se didn't felt so good that day, but Beast Boy and Cyborg where really insistent.

Cy knew what she felt about Robin and Starfire, and although he felt really bad for her, he decided that he should help her to recover from the emotional shock. Cyborg was happy for Robin and Starfire, he really was, but he couldn't help feeling a bit angry about what that new status in the group did to Raven's emotional stability –she of all of them had to broke her equilibrium over a silly crush, how stupid could that be?. Cy did his best to avoid her from locking herself up in her room trying to put her emotions in check by herself. She thanked him for worrying about her.

But as I was saying, they were on their way to the tower after a pizza night, and all of them where _exhausted_. Raven noted that Richard never left Kori's side and she tried to ignore it, succeeding on it.

When the Titans arrived to their home, all that was said was the proper 'good night's' and everybody left to their rooms. Everybody but Starfire and Robin. Although, Rachel didn't know that until a few hours later.

Raven was fast asleep when her head hit the was used to be this exhausted everyday because she had to make an extra effort to keep herself like she usually would be around the Titans. Thankfully, Robin was not the type to usually demonstrate affection in public, though Kori surely was. It was not a big issue, because Starfire seemed to comprehend he was not comfortable about displaying such behavior with the others around, so she seemed to be content with holding hands and one or two hugs in the common room.

Raven thought, however, that this night would be as easy-going as usual, but a few hours later –maybe two– her eyes opened in shock and she was wide awake.

And then she decided she hated her bond with Richard _so fucking much_ because his emotions were haunting her and chocking her and she just had to _cry_ and _whine_ in silence.

There was so much lust and pleasure in his side of the bond. She felt Kori's presence on Richard's mind and room and she closed her eyes trying to stop the tears and block their bond. Kori had the same feelings and everything suddenly made sense.

Kori and Richard were making love in Richard's room. She sobbed, and her window shattered.

It was two in the morning and all she felt she could do was ran to the roof, trying to get away from their feelings. From _her_ feelings.

Richard used to block their bond very well when he didn't want her to know something about him. He constantly managed to block their bond to some feelings or thoughts, because he wanted privacy, and Raven gave him that much. She respected his own thoughts or feelings because she knew he would do the same for her.

This time, Richard was so distracted and feeling so much at the same time that he had forgoten to block the bond at all. She saw everything, even if she tried not to, his emotions where so intense, like they were searching for _her_. And the images in Robin's mind... Raven felt herself dying inside.

It was a torturous pain in her mind and she just cried in complete silence. Not even a moan or scream escaped from her parted would it matter? She thought. It is none of her concern anyways. She shouldn't care at all!

Now, she was meditating in the roof. She had stopped sobbing but her tears kept coming. The sun was starting to illuminate Jump City and she sighed. _The Titans must be awake._ She didn't fucking care, she decided.

_Must be 7 A.M._ She thought. _He must be waking up for his morning routine. Unless he's _too tired_ from last night._

She hated the fact that she knew him so much, and she started sobbing again.

It was supposed to be an stupid crush. But it wasn't stupid, she realized, nor just a crush.

Rachel Roth was in love with Richard Grayson. _Fuck_, her life sucked _so much._

"Raven?" his voice rang behind her and she closed her eyes and started shaking. Why had to be him of all the Titans? Why not Beast Boy –she was so broken his bad jokes would make her feel better, she thought– or Cy? –whom most likely would have stayed quiet and comforting her untill she felt better– "Raven, what are you doing here? Are you cold?"

"I am fine, Richard. Go away." Her voice cracked, her lips dry as a dessert.

She felt him gasp in surprise. She imagined his blue, blue eyes widening to her cold tone. Why was she treating him like that? Pushing him away?

_'Why?'_ his pained voice rang in her head, he was trying to reach to her from their bond. He was so oblivious of what she was feeling it may be amusing if she wasn't so sad.

All Richard received was Rachel's doors to her mind being slammed in his face.

"I said go away" she whispered. And as stubborn as he was, he stayed there. She felt anger boiling in her vains. "Stay the fuck away from me, Dick!" something cracked arround them and she closed her eyes again. She was losing control, so she desperately pronounced her chant.

His heart stopped beating for a second. What was wrong? Was she in pain? Was she mad at him? Why?

"I'm just worried about you, Rachel" his voice soft. He stepped forward carefully. Her powers weren't something to easily ignore.

_'Oh, of course you are, you fucking liar'_ her pained and cracked voice in his head snapped without her consent. He blinked in confusion and felt pain. Her side of the bond let go anger, pain, jealousy and love,all at the same time, and she suddenly panicked and closed herself again. Richard raised a brow.

"Just... go ahead and return to Kori's arms" Raven voice sounded tired and defeated. She searched for Kori and found her still in Robin's room. "She must be cold in your room"

He felt his heart pounding and he froze in his spot, his mind running through everything. _Fuck_, he thought embarrassed, still not understanding her anger._ I must have forgotten to... shit._

He sighed nervous and waited for her to say something. Her shoulders shaking, which he didn't know what meant.

Until he heard her sniff and sob. She was crying. What for?

Richard started analyzing everything. The few emotions that she let him feel about her, her words and her rude and cold attitude towards him, and that she was giving her back to him, never once looking him in the eye.

He didn't understand.

"Wha–? I'm so sorry you had to... I'm sorry, Raven. I'm so embarrassed–Why are you crying? Are you hurt?" his mind running a mile a second trying to have answers by himself because something told him that she won't talk to him. Not now. Not ever again.

He felt fear suddenly.

"None of your business, you don't care. Just leave me alone, Richard" she chocked in pain, her body touching the ground when her concentration was too difficult to maintain herself levitating.

"I do ca–"

"I don't what you to" she interrupted. There was a moment of silence and he walked towards her, carefulness be damned. He put his hand on her shoulder and tried to make her face him, but she pushed him away with her dark magic. He fell hard to the ground and she turned her head over her shoulder, concerned on how much force did she use.

Richard sawa glimpse of her empty eyes, full of betrayal and pain and a broken heart. And then his eyes widened behind his mask. It all made sense now. How stupid could he have been?

Rachel was in love with him, he concluded, and he felt worse. He always thought she didn't like him that way and...

God he should have talked to her and told her that he liked her as well long ago! Nobody would have said he didn't try! But he had been such a coward…

"Rachel, I am so sorry. I didn't know you felt that way–" He was desperate now. He felt guilty and broken and...

He had made the biggest mistake.

"Rachel, I don't know what to say.. I– I am so, so sorry"

She finally faced him, her eyes wide, full of panic. '_He knows_' her mind screamed '_he knows about my feelings. He noticed, I should have just... ran away! I am so stupid!'_

"You–You don't have to, Richard... Just forget about it... just ignore I even felt that way... forget I even exist" her voice just made him notice how scared she was about him knowing her secret. His eyes softened. Why was she scared of it? Of him?

"I won't, Rachel." he whispered softly, walking towards her. She stepped back shaking again, her eyes full of tears. He frowned. "Don't– don't run away from me, Rae" he said affectively.

She stayed there and he reached her.

Next thing she knew she was in his arms, and all her emotions where screaming in panic. This shouldn't be happening.

"I–...I always thought you..." That _you didn't felt that way for me._ He said through his bond, cowardice overtaking his voice. She looked at him confused. He is not saying what she thought he meant. He saw her shaking and lost. His embrace tightened.

"I love you, Rachel" he said, and her eyes widened. Then her face contorted in a grimace.

"Don't you _dare_–" She stared and he shut her mouth. But before he continued, he took his mask off.

And she saw his blue eyes for the first time. She had seen them on his mind... but not this way. Her heart stopped and she started crying again. Damn it. Her emotions were a mess.

"Yes, I _dare_, Rachel. I liked you but I was such a coward and never told you... damn it, I am sorry. Don´t cry, _please_".

Raven took in his intense eyes, loving them instantly. She snapped out of the spell his eyes caused on her and avoided his gaze.

"You're with Starfire now, it's too late" she said without looking at his eyes. His blue eyes made her fill so happy but sad at the same time, so sad.

She tried to get away from him, he noticed, and he let her go. She saw him looking at her carefully and saddened for hurting her like this.

She took a step back, then another, and then her feet were not touching the ground. His blue eyes stared panicked as she got away from him.

"Rachel, don't–" she shook her head and moved forward, placing her lips in his cheek. He blushed, and took her face in his hands, moving it so he could kiss her lips properly. Her eyes widened and then closed, responding to the kiss for just a quick moment. This was the only moment she could cherish forever.

"You're not breaking another girl's heart, Robin. Let me go. I'll let you go as well" His eyes widened and felt the soft and cold hands of Raven caressing his face.

She gave him a small smile and he was left alone in the roof of the T tower, his knees in the ground and his blue eyes staring into Jump city. He had lost her.

And she never said 'Good bye'.


End file.
